learn to listen to His voice.

Whether you call it following your heart, intuition, or the Spirit, have you ever had a hard time discerning an answer to a heartfelt question?

There have been times in my life that I have experienced very strong, undeniable answers. But, there have also been times during which I have felt confused, and unsure about a decision.

One of the greatest treasures I hold dear is the gift to receive spiritual revelation - as in receiving personal answers from my Heavenly Father. The Church I belong to is founded upon the very belief that we are all entitled to receive direct communication from God - that He desires to bless us with more light and knowledge. But there have been times when I have felt frustrated that I wasn't sure if an answer was truly coming from Him, or from the devil, a real being who desires to deceive us and lead us astray, and make us miserable! I definitely need to know the source of the answers I receive, and learn to discern truth from error.


A few weeks ago, I learned something I would like to share.

When you have a quiet moment to yourself, take some deep, cleansing breaths, close your eyes, and ask in your heart:

What does "yes" feel like?

and then, ask:

What does "no" feel like?

Allow yourself a few minutes to truly experience the feelings that come up with each answer. I have recorded in my personal journal what my personal answers feel like.


I have determined to ask for this "baseline" before praying about and making just about any kind of decision.

We must use the correct technology to receive correct answers. (image source)

The first week I learned this particular technique of discerning the Spirit, I decided I would put this knowledge to the test. I had planned to go to a particular store to pick up some food storage items. In my prayer, I felt a strong "no" when I asked about this particular store - and so, I decided to go to a different store, for which I received a strong "yes" answer. I thought it a little strange to receive such a strong answer just about a grocery store, and I even asked two more times to be sure. But I wanted to show my obedience, hoping to receive even more light and knowledge.

Imagine my mild frustration when the store I knew I was supposed to go to didn't have everything I was looking for. Out of stock. Disappointed, but still knowing something good would come from this, I left and determined to return another day.

As I began to leave the parking lot, I saw a man with a cardboard sign. I rolled down my passenger window, and while asking "Are you hungry?" I offered a granola bar to him. He approached the car, and our eyes met. While this was not the first time I have given something to someone in need, this was the first time, at least in a significant period of time, that I looked so deeply into his eyes. I saw light there, in those blue eyes. I saw a child of God. It was as if our souls had a conversation.

No significant words were exchanged - a simple thank you and you are welcome. But looking into my brother's eyes was healing for me.

Looking back and pondering on this experience, I think it was a chance to allow my spirit to tell his spirit, without words, I care about you. God cares about you. You are a child of God. I love you, and God loves you. And I know that my spirit received love and healing in this exchange, as well.

"The Everlasting and Almighty God, the Creator of this vast universe, will speak to those who approach Him with a sincere heart and real intent.

He will speak to them in dreams, visions, thoughts, and feelings.

He will speak in a way that is unmistakable and that transcends human experience. He will give them divine direction and answers for their personal lives.

Of course, there will be those who scoff and say such a thing is impossible, that if there were a God, He would have better things to do than hear and answer a single person’s prayer.

But I tell you this: God cares about you. He will listen, and He will answer your personal questions. The answers to your prayers will come in His own way and in His own time, and therefore, you need to learn to listen to His voice. God wants you to find your way back to Him, and the Savior is the way.⁵ God wants you to learn of His Son, Jesus Christ, and experience the profound peace and joy that come from following the path of divine discipleship."

(President Uchtdorf, October 2014)

rice experiment - words and thoughts have power

Have you heard of the rice experiment? I heard about it while taking a meditation class and decided to try it with my family.

This is what I did to start the experiment:

Place rice and water in 3 jars. I used about 1/4 cup cooked rice with 1/2 cup water in each small jar.

Label each jar:

Happy: this one you will say happy and kind things to (I love you, Thank you, etc.).

Sad/Mad: to this jar you will say unkind and cruel things.

Ignore: this jar will be ignored for the duration of the experiment.


I had some doubts that it would work, but I began the experiment with the intention that I and my family would learn something meaningful from this.

Day 1 of the rice experiment

My kids (ages 4 and 1) thought it was funny to talk to the jars - I had to put the ignore jar up out of their reach to ensure more accurate results. 

At every mealtime - and whenever else we thought about it, we said happy things to the happy jar, and mean things to the sad/mad jar. 

I also used the sad/mad jar as my outlet for frustration - whenever I felt unkind thoughts, I directed them towards that jar. I never actually felt better after thinking and saying these unkind things - in fact, I started to feel guilty for thinking and saying them. 

After one week:

After one week, the Happy jar was still white, the Ignore jar had black mold, and the Sad/Mad jar had red mold.

I was both surprised and saddened at these results, and was surprised at how much emotion I felt towards these jars. I felt guilty for two jars growing mold, because I knew I was responsible. 

I also felt guilty for every unkind thought and word I have ever had or said. 

I felt an increased desire to treat everyone, but especially members of my family with more kindness, and to speak with love towards everyone.

I was also repulsed by the mold and felt even more negative thoughts looking at the jars, which I am sure multiplied the mold's growth.

After two weeks:

After two weeks, the Happy jar was still all white, the Ignore jar had even more gross mold, and the Sad/Mad looked the worst with black and red mold everywhere. 

Here are close ups of the jars after two weeks:

After two weeks, I was even more repulsed by the moldy jars. 

I know have a greater understanding of the power of our thoughts, words and deeds. 

(source)

After three weeks, I felt an increased desire to be more careful about just about everything I expose myself and my family to. I choose carefully the TV shows and movies I watch, the music I listen to, even the things I view online. 

I also was reminded of times when I had friends or family try to convince me to watch awful movies, and I felt physically ill during anything violent or scary, or otherwise immoral. 

I sometimes joke that I get nightmares even from watching Jurassic Park, but it is true - I am very sensitive and truly affected by what I am exposed to. 

(Here is a fascinating read on getting good or bad energy from the things you see online)

This has become more of a motto for me - not just because I was "told" to, but because I really want to fill my life with good things:

Article of Faith 13: 

We believe in being honest, true, chaste, benevolent, virtuous, and in doing good to all men; indeed, we may say that we follow the admonition of Paul-We believe all things, we hope all things, we have endured many things, and hope to be able to endure all things. If there is anything virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.

Remember that old rhyme?

"Sticks and stones may break my bones,

but words will never hurt me."

Such a lie! I remember in the third grade, confiding to my mom that my "best friends" had said cruel things to me. She repeated that line to me, trying to help me feel better, but I remember I felt like crying after hearing it. Now I realize it was my spirit discerning a lie. 

Our words and thoughts have power! 

Will you use your thoughts and words for positive change in the world?

The end of the experiment... 

After three weeks, I felt that my family had learned the lesson and I decided it was time to clean out the jars. As I opened each jar, I felt so tempted to just throw the moldy ones away. I examined the moldy lids and jars, and considered what I should do. They were canning jars, and I always hate to throw away things that can be useful, but they were really gross!


Emotion overcame me as I realized that this was the lesson to be learned.


I felt the understanding that the Atonement covers all the nasty stuff that someone might be tempted to throw away. Though your sins and wounds seem scarlet red, you and I can become white, clean and pure. His Grace is sufficient to cleanse all of us.

For a video of Masaru Emoto's Rice Experiment: 

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wc-ZmvxfBxE

Are your beliefs limiting you?

One of the greatest lessons I have learned (still learning!) in the last few years is to trust my intuition. To trust the thoughts that bring warmth, not emptiness. The thoughts that empower and bring gratitude, not fear. This journey, to trust the light within me, seemed to speed up as I became a mother. There are all sorts of opinions when it comes to raising a child. I had my own opinions, or so I thought, and then we brought a baby home, and all of a sudden, my opinions, my beliefs about what a child “should” do, clashed with what my baby told me, and what a little tiny voice inside my heart also told me—first and foremost, listen to your baby!

Four and a half years later, I am still getting to know my intuition. It seems that every day, I let go of more false, limiting beliefs, most of them deeply embedded in my subconscious, in order to trust my intuition.

Some beliefs limit us – usually these involve a negative, such as “I can’t do that, I am not strong enough for that, I could never…” These beliefs do NOT come from God, or any being associated with light. Do not believe them!

Other beliefs, however, are freeing.

“The real me, the spirit child of God, is the author of our righteous desires, our hunger for salvation, and of our longing to eventually become reunited with our heavenly home. When the light of Christ is able to penetrate our hearts, prompted by the enlightened testimony of truth by a focused teacher, it will cause in us a state of awakening, an awakening of the real me, the child of God, so that we can learn to channel our desires to focus on our true needs.” (F. Enzio Busche, “Unleashing the Dormant Spirit”)

One of the most important beliefs I have embraced, is that God loves us, unconditionally. Unconditionally. UNCONDITIONALLY! (do you believe it yet?)

This is a conversation Lucas and I had in August, after I felt guilty when I had been getting impatient (understatement!) with him during bedtime routine. I snuggled with him in his bed, and looked in his eyes.

Me: Did you know that I love you? And did you know that I love you when you are happy, and when you are sad?

Lucas - silent but wide eyed and listening 

Me: And did you know that I love you when you make good choices, but also when you don't make good choices?

Lucas smiled really big, so I continued.

Me: And did you know that God loves us when we make good choices, and when we don't make good choices? 
(at this point I teared up as I felt God confirming this truth to me!)

Lucas: (huge smiles!) Yeah! And I love YOU even when you get mad, and I love Daddy even if he gets mad, and I love ME when I am mad!

Yes, God loves me, even when I lose my patience with others, even when I make the most embarrassing mistakes.

"Do you realize how deeply The Lord loves and cherishes you, even now? Our Savior has the power to cleanse and heal you. He can remove the pain and sorrow you feel and make you clean again through the power of His Atonement." (Sister Linda S. Reeves, April 2014 LDS general conference)

These beliefs – these truths, they resonate deep within my being. They set me free. And I know that literally, nothing is impossible with God. I believe this so wholeheartedly that I feel upset when I hear my sweet 4 year old say “I can’t do it!” I try to kindly suggest a different phrase to express his frustration, but I emphatically remind him, “You can!--and it is okay to ask for help.” Because I know that I have God and angels on my side, whispering, “You can do it!”

June 2012

Every moment with our children can be a healing moment. An opportunity to change our past, to heal our hearts, let go of the lies, to break a cycle. The way we were treated can become our autopilot, but if we live consciously we can change our inner voice. 

With God, all things are possible.